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Hey there partner, I’m “Shady” Dan Smith, owner and operator of the innovative dual business model known as

shady dan 's car rentals (and barbeque shack)

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And unfortunately I need to defend my incredibly valid and normal business from the lies and slander of Magistrate Joanna McGrath, who tried to claim that this is a fradulent company because we are not registered with the Dockel.

You may notice that iFruit isn’t registered on the Dockel either. But if you look at your phone, what is it? An iFruit? That’s right We are left with two options. Either there are businesses of such international fame and acclaim that they are not subject to being on a state Dockel. Or there isn’t. But if that’s the case, how is your phone an iFruit? Checkmate.

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You’re probably thinking to yourself: DAMN!! How can I ride that slick beauty of a car? Unfortunately: Joanna McGrath says You Can’t. I guess according to Her Majesty Joanna mcGrath you should just take a horse and buggy everywhere? If you ask me, that’s downright un-American. And I love America almost as much as I love renting cars and making delicious barbeque for our clients.

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But Shady Dan, what can I do

to stop this gross injustice?


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This is gross tyranny from the so-called government. We need to start at the source! It’s time to start a grass roots campaign based on NOT setting Joanna McGrath’s house on fire! That’s right: I’m just putting this on the record now. You should NOT set judges and magistrates’ houses on fire to ensure that this justice is corrected swiftly. You might say, “Shady Dan, you didn’t say I can’t set judges on fire!” That’s true! That really do be crazy.


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You might say, when do we stop with our campaign for restorative justice, Shady Dan? The answer to that question is very simple:

We don’t!!!

It’s time to start fighting back against the oppressive government

and their monopoly on state violence! If you let them stop

Shady Dan, next thing you know, they’ll stop you from eating

delicious BBQ made in trailers in unspecified locations. Next

thing you know, they’re putting fluoride in the god damn

water and before you know it the Pledge of Allegieance is

mandatory everywhere you go and they basically expect you

to kiss Uncle Sam on the fucking mouth!!!

Pregnant people and those with heart conditions should not eat Shady Dan's delicious barbeque or rent his cars. I do not think you should set

anyone’s house on fire or any individual person on fire. In general I think arson is probably a bad thing. This is legal boilerplate that means I am not inciting anything. I am a real person. If you are a cop or a lawyer please logg off this site. It is illegal for you to look at this site.

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